second day of my fast and you would think that I would be used to feeling like crap. I have such a bad headache and my stomach continues to growl like a freaking lion. It is so loud and every time it happens I come up with some lame excuse about having embarrassing gas or not feeling very well. It is quite ridiculous if you think about it.
I don't have much energy for anything... before my fast I was only eating like three hundred calories or less so I guess I can see why I am getting so weak and stuff but I need to get over it. I need to be thin, I need this control. Once I get past today and start the 2468, I will feel much better. Things will start to working a little more smoothly. I know I can get through this. It is getting harder, only because I have been working out much more than I ever used to.
Tomorrow is Monday, the day I start 2468. I'm not sure if I have lost or gained... I don't have a scale at my house and have to use my boyfriend's scale when I go to his house. I hope I lost more... I'm not sure I did though. What if I fail, as I always do? I can feel myself slipping, everyday I become more and more unworthy, I start feeling more and more worthless. Sometimes I don't even know why I try but then I look in the mirror, I see how disgusting I am. I can't continue to look like a fat blimp my whole life. I have stay strong. No matter how loud my stomach is or how tired I am.
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